Go technology free for a free meal

Frankie & Bennys have recently introduced a new incentive for it’s customers. Hand in your phones into the restaurant and kids will eat FREE!

What do you think? As soon as I heard this I felt compelled to write about it. As much as I think this idea will be good for some families, I also think it’s incredibly sad that the restaurant has had to think of something to bring families together.

I have very traditional/strong views when it comes to this. I cook for my family most nights and I have one rule at the dinner table – NO PHONES! When we come together at the end of the day I think it’s important to give each other our full attention to reconnect and find out about everyones day and just general chit chat. This is usually the time my son Luca opens up to me about his school day, he tells me all sorts of stories and I would hate to miss out on that because I was too busy being distracted by some sort of technology. I could not imagine sitting at a table with my family or my friends with my head in my phone ignoring them.

Now maybe by unpopular opinion but my greatest pet peeve is seeing families out for a meal and their children have iPads shoved in their faces 😞. I understand it’s totally easier for the parents to do this, it enables the child to sit still and to be distracted therefore parents get to have a little adult talk and a minute to themselves I get it I really do but I think theres a time and place for technology and it’s up to us as parents to distinguish this. I don’t think dining out is the place for constant technology use.

Statistics research shows that up to 72% of children wish their parents would spend less time on their phones and 1 in 10 children have even gone as far as to hide their parents phone. This makes me so incredibly sad.

With that being said I think Frankie and Bennys move to bring in the no phone zone when dining out is GREAT! It will hopefully bring families closer together and help people engage with each other again.

Would you go phone/technology free ?

How waking up at 6am changed my life…

I don’t know about you, but I was always one for snoozing the alarm when the morning would roll around. Just 5 more mins pleaseee!

Doing this was a bad habit that I needed to break. It made me fly around in the mornings, be all over the place, forgetting things, being snappy, being irritated, unorganised, not having time for breakfast, being hangry and just a tornado of anxiety rushing around leaving a trail of disorganised mess behind me. (Which I would later regret as I would be the one tidying it all up later in the day πŸ˜„πŸ€·πŸ»β€β™€οΈ)…It literally made no sense, I would swear to myself that I would go to bed at a reasonable time that night, so I wouldn’t be so tired in the mornings, Always thought of it but never did it πŸ™ˆ… this began to really grate on me so I finally decided to change something.

One day two years ago I set just one alarm for 6am, switched the snooze option off and fell asleep. Morning came around and the alarm went off. Now I knew this was it, no snooze, I rather get my arse up now or i’ll fall back asleep and end up late for work, late for taking Luca to school and just plain LATE for the day ahead. So with that one alarm I dragged myself up out of bed and began my morning routine. Luca still fast asleep so I was able to get ready in peace, which for a parent is one of the best things! πŸ™ŒπŸ» I was able to think clearly so I didn’t forget anything, I was able to have breakfast and even have a little tidy up before we left,?so I didn’t have as much to do when I got home. My day was already going well before I even left the door. I felt so much calmer, organised and motivated for the day ahead. This feeing was something that stuck with me. The feeling of being rushed is awful, it’s my absolute pet hate. It’s enough to make you throw your bags on the ground and say thats it i’m not adulting today. But this newfound having time to spare in the mornings and being able to leisurely get through my morning routine and chores was amazing. So thats how the 6am get up stuck.

Being up before your children works so well too. At the time it can be hard to muster up the motivation to get out of bed while they are still asleep, but it’s so worth it when you get your own time to get yourself and the house ready before they even wake up. It makes the whole day go smoother I promise.

A morning routine sets your tone for the day so heres how waking up earlier can change your life for the better :

β€’ You will become more organised.

β€’ Increased productivity.

β€’ You will become more motivated.

β€’ Have extra time to focus on yourself and your thoughts, gaining more clarity over your life.

β€’ Your days will go smoother.

β€’ You will gain a better bedtime routine – from waking up early, your bedtime routine falls into place much easier. Your too tired to watch one more episode on netflix.

β€’ You will be able to have your own time which makes you feel more fulfilled and content with your life.

β€’ Your house will become more organised.

β€’ You will be on time.

β€’ Reduce anxiety.

β€’ You will have time for things that make you feel good – e.g yoga/meditation/breakfast.

β€’ You become a better planner.

β€’ Better sleeping pattern.

β€’ Better concentration.

Why not give it a go? It took one alarm for me to change, and i’m so glad I did. My mornings have become easier and I feel happier.

Ps. I’m a firm believer in balance, so I only set 6am alarms during the week and I give myself a break on the weekends. I usually don’t have to be up and out early during then, so i’m able to enjoy a little lie in. As i’m a mum I class 7am on a weekend a lie in πŸ˜„ but at least i’m able to enjoy getting up with the children without rushing around. It’s the best of both worlds really πŸ™ŒπŸ».

As always thank you for stopping by ☺️

Frankie x

Things I quit to improve my mental health

Most blog posts on mental health, promote what we SHOULD be doing to create a healthy balance, but have you ever wondered what we could STOP doing to help ourselves? Small simple lifestyle changes can have a BIG impact on our overall health.

Here are some tips on things that I stopped doing to improve my holistic wellbeing.

Late bedtime

Sleep is so incredibly important, I see it as a type of meditation. It’s the time when our mind rests and resets. It rejuvenates us. I used to go to bed at anytime I wanted usually past midnight. The morning would roll around so quick and I would feel exhausted and irritated throughout the day. Creating an actual bedtime was paramount for me, it’s made me wake up fresher. I aim to be in bed before 10.00pm. This doesn’t necessarily mean asleep by then, but just in bed by that time. Read a book, write in a journal or just have some quiet time to think to yourself. (Little tip, when winding down ready for a good nights sleep don’t use technology). This leads on to the next bit of advice…

Social media usage

Don’t set a bedtime and then go to bed and sit on your phone or watch TV the light that our phones and TVs produce make us more alert and awake, making falling asleep much harder. Social media is addicting, we all do it, we all scroll through our social accounts. It can be great but theres another side that can leave you comparing yourself to people online. Comparison steals happiness and can produce a lot of unwanted emotions. Limit social media usage and watch how it changes your life for the better!

Alcohol

Now your probably getting to this bit and thinking she wants me to give up all my fun πŸ˜„. Not at all, I understand alcohol is a part of peoples lives, it’s a minority of people these days that actually don’t drink. All I advise is if your going to drink, do if moderately look at your consumption, alcohol is a well known depressant. If your not feeing your best self, take away the alcohol for a few days/weeks and just see how you feel without. I personally gave up alcohol completely a few years ago and I can’t think of one negative, towards doing so.

Coffee/Caffeine intake

Caffeine is a stimulant, that can cause anxiety. It has negative impacts on your health. Just be aware of how much you are consuming. I don’t drink coffee at all, but there is caffeine hidden in lots of different drinks and foods so just be aware.

Moaning, complaining and gossiping

What you give out into the world, you get back. By complaining and moaning about things you are actually attracting more of those feelings and situations towards you. Be aware of your words and what you talk about. No matter what sort of day you have had always look for the positives and remember theres ALWAYS something to be grateful for. Talk more about what your grateful for, and watch how your mindset will change. You will see your life in a different perspective.

Junk food and exercise

I feel these go hand in hand, now don’t get me wrong I am no where near a health fanatic or a clean eating machine. This is a point that I need to improve more on. But I am aware of what foods and their amount that I put into my body. I also ensure I do some kind of exercise everyday as I know just how important endorphins are for our wellbeing and how good they actually make you feel.

Now for a tip on what YOU should DO

Go outdoors

Being outdoors gives you all sorts of benefits, it’s something I need to do every single day to feel the best I can. It’s so beneficial to me feeling good that I had to share with you! I make sure I go on a walk somewhere in nature everyday. This is part of my self care, it’s what makes me feel good about myself. It’s a stress reliever for me, it helps to clear my mind and think more clearly. Try getting outdoors everyday for 5 days and see you feel.

Remember these tips are designed to help you. Don’t pressure yourself, I just want to be able to share some things that have helped me and may help you too.

You can’t keep doing the same thing and expect a change so why not just give one or two a try and see how it works. ☺️

Thank you for reading!

Tips on how to stay organised

Routine and organisation makes life a whole lot easier, especially if you have children. Here are a few helpful tips that I have found to be really useful when it comes to adulting and mumlife πŸ™ŒπŸ» Hope they help you!

β€’ Daily to do lists – tick of as you complete

β€’ Write appointments down as soon as you get them and stick on fridge

β€’ Have a calendar hung up somewhere you will see it everyday. (Mines next to the fridge ha)

β€’ Create morning and bedtime routines

β€’ Pack bags the night before

β€’ Create a meal plan on a Sunday for your week ahead

β€’ Put your phone down (excessive phone use decreases productivity and wastes time)

β€’ Attempt one task at a time, stop multi tasking all jobs at once

β€’ Declutter and organise your home/room for a clear mind

β€’ Have a place for everything in your home

β€’ Have a chore list – daily chores that need doing to keep your space organised

β€’ If possible have direct debits come out the same day. This allows you to budget easier, knowing how much you have left once all bills are taken out at the same time.

Is there anything you do that keeps your life organised? Id love to try them out πŸ˜€

Self care ideas

We are all so busy in our lives and taking care of others, that we often forget we need to care for ourselves too. So following on from an earlier post talking about the importance of self care. Here are some self care ideas, see if you can try and fit just one of them into your day today! You deserve it ❀️

  • DO NOTHING!
  • Take a walk
  • Read a book/magazine
  • Take a long bubble bath
  • Clean or reorganize a room
  • Go for a pedicure
  • Meditate
  • Turn your phone of and watch your favourite movie without any distractions
  • Paint
  • Tidy or declutter – I swear by this, it declutters the mind
  • Face mask
  • Have the courage to say NO to people
  • Put yourself first
  • Listen to positive affirmations (youtube)
  • Paint your nails
  • Write a bucket list
  • Write in your journal
  • Sit in a peaceful place outdoors
  • Start a gratitude journal
  • Play with a pet
  • Do yoga
  • Gardening – plant something new
  • Go for a spa day
  • Listen to your favourite music
  • Get a massage
  • Colour – I love my adult colouring book, it allows my thoughts to detangle. I find myself in a clearer head space afterwards. Try it! ☺️
  • Stay in your PJs all day
  • Listen to a positive/uplifting podcast
  • Light your favourite candles
  • Online shop – treat yourself!

Is there anything else that you do to take care of yourself? ☺️

Gratitude Journals for children

Gratitude journaling is something that only takes a few minutes per day but can have a big positive impact on your ls and your childrens holistic development, mental health and overall wellbeing.

A gratitude journal is simply something you do to keep track of all the good things your thankful for in life. Usually kept in a book form, you write what you are thankful for that day and what the best bit of the day was etc. No matter what your day looked like, there is ALWAYS something to be thankful for. It’s incredibly easy to start, simply buy a notebook, a pen and start writing daily, about the positives and goodness in your days. The more you focus on the goodness in your life it enables you to gain a different perspective. I whisper thank you to myself continually throughout the day, as soon as I wake in the morning I say thank you out loud and at night I gather all my thankful thoughts and write them down in my book.

Gratitude journals are for everyone! Adults and children of all ages. I started one over a year ago and seeing first hand how powerful this simple tool is to enhance your happiness I decided Luca should try one out too. We do ours after a bath at bedtime, Luca is winding down and able to focus on his thoughts. I find this time very special for both of us, it’s a meaningful bonding time where we are together without any distractions and are able to think about our day clearly. I’m able to get a better insight to Luca’s day and his thoughts. The gratitude journal is full of benefits for us all, but I especially think it’s great for children to start as early as possible because:

β€’ They become more present and mindful

β€’ Improves attitude and builds character

β€’ Become more self aware

β€’ Reduces stress & worries

β€’ Opens communication

β€’ Gives them a different perspective on life

β€’ Develop a sense of thankfulness and gratitude for even the littlest things in life

β€’ Improve emotional well being

β€’ Acknowledging and appreciating the simple things in life

β€’ Allows parents to understand their children on a different level

β€’ Gives children a positive mind set

β€’ Builds resilience

β€’ Promotes life long skills they can carry on through adulthood

β€’ Produces feelings of accomplishment and belonging

β€’ Attracts more good things to come their way

Gratitude Journaling is a way to de stress, calm down, unwind and become mindful. Especially important if your busy and nonstop all day, you and your children need down time to just be in the moment to ground yourselves. Once you start to practise gratitude you will see opportunity to give thanks where ever you go. ☺️

A page out of Luca’s journal πŸ™πŸ»

lets stop the mum shaming!

 

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Hi guys! hope your all doing good, I just wanted to pop over and write a post about something that has really been getting to me these past few weeks.

Does anyone else feel like everyone is in competition with each other these days? Especially when it comes to parenthood and raising our children! The mum shaming phenomenon where everyone feels entitled to express their judgements is absolutely unnecessary and harmful it needs to STOP!

I’m sure women reading this will understand what I am talking about and the ways in which we are shamed. Every aspect of our lives is looked at and judged, without people even really knowing us most of the time. Everything down to what our children eat, if a mother is breastfeeding or bottle-feeding, co-sleeping, if your a young mum, if you home school your children, if your a stay at home mum or working mum, if your a single mum, even down to how many Christmas presents you buy your children – everything is scrutinised. I think I can talk on behalf of a lot of mums, that we are absolutely exhausted with having the pressure of being the perfect parent.Β I have spoke to a few friends about this and they have told me that’s just what you sign up for when you become a mother, but I don’t believe it should be this way!

Women should be empowering each other, lift each other up, help each other and spreading kindness to one another. That’s why I wanted to write this post to try and uplift some of you mama’s. If your child has ate fish fingers 3 nights in the row your still a good mum, if your child sat on an iPad for 3 hours straight just so you could get a little peace your still a good mum, if you breastfeed or bottle feed your still a good mum, if you forgot to read your child a bedtime story last night your still a good mum, if the children have stayed indoors all day your still a good mum., if you buy your children lots of Christmas presents or if you only buy your child one your still a good mum. It’s wrong to make a person feel less than because they do something different from you. I’m all about wanting to helping others and trying to empower women. I wrote a post about choosing not to use an iPad whilst Luca is young, but I would never judge parents who do use them not for one second! We all have to do what we need to, to get through the day sometimes, we all parent differently, and I can’t understand why everyone can’t just be content with how they parent without passing comments onto other parenting styles. As long as that child is healthy, happy and safe it should not matter.

Logging onto social media can be the worst playground for the mum shaming, so I’m hoping to spread some kindness over there today. If you head over to my Instagram you will see I have posted a picture, tag a mama you know to let her know she is doing a great job. Make someone smile today, uplift and empower someone today ❀

 

Age is just a number!

 

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I hope with this post it can change at least one persons perspective on young mums. To understand that it takes a type of person, not an age to be a good mother. I was 18 when I became pregnant and I have endured and still endure stereotyping, judgements, stares and comments from others, especially now that I have a 4 year old shouting mama across the supermarket, I notice peoples looks as if she’s to young to have a 4 year old. This is something that honestly effects me and I know must do so for so many others. The frustration that you feel because you are instantly judged before even opening your mouth to speak, just based on how you look or your age is so disheartening.

I recall many of times that I was made to feel inadequate. One time at a midwife appointment I remember a woman just staring at me in the waiting room, not taking her eyes of me, looking at my big bump in disgust. I turned to look at her and she shook her head and tuted at me. That lady made me feel like the scum of the earth. I had people tell me I was a silly little girl, my life was ruined, my life was over and that no man would ever want me now I have a child and that I will loose all my friends. How awful is that? Nobody should be made to feel that way.

I feel it’s very wrong to assume because of age a person will be a better mother, just because a woman is in her 30s/40s does not mean she will find motherhood easy and be the best mum. No matter what age raising a child is hard for us all, you don’t just automatically get an easy baby because your classed as ‘older’.

I have always wanted to rise above the stigma attached to me because I’m a young mum. It makes me so happy when people compliment me on how I parent Luca, how good of a job I am doing and how hard I have worked to get a career and college qualifications with a baby in tow. I had to deal with a lot of negativity through my pregnancy and to hear positive opinions makes me so proud. This is the messageΒ  I want to get across, lets uplift women, stop the judging and staring, help a mother who is dealing with a screaming baby while trying to do the food shop don’t tut and stare. Be open minded to the fact that these ‘young mums’ are doing all they can for their children and doing a damn good job at it too. Many women in their 30s/40s already have their career path, young mums are still having to figure all that out with a baby too. Have compassion and don’t judge a book by it’s cover. Were all doing the best we can, women receive so much pressure from society as it is, lets stick together to empower each other rather than tear each other down.

Being a young mum for me means that when Luca is 21 I will be 39. I love that, I wish people were more positive when I was pregnant I wish people would of told me that being a mother is the greatest gift anyone could receive, that being a young mum means you get longer with your children and grandchildren, that you will love this little person more than your own life, they will be your best friend, that you will still be young enough when they are grown up to do all the things you have wanted to do, that they will change your life for the better, that you will cry with happiness when their little hand touches yours and that all will be ok… πŸ™‚ ❀