A letter to my first born

Luca, as the weeks are going by so fast and soon your little sister will be with us, I wanted to write you a little something to let you know how you have been the biggest and best adventure of my life. To also say thank you for making me into mamma first.

I was only 18 when I found out you were in my belly. I was scared and excited all wrapped into one. I remember feeling you move around for the first time and never feeling alone from that point on. I would dream of what you and your little personality would be like and I prayed for you every single day and still to this day do now.

The day you came into the world, was the day my life changed forever. I remember being all alone in the hospital, early hours of the morning, too overwhelmed to sleep I sat up all night watching you. I held you in my arms and stared at your beautiful little face wondering how I got so lucky. I remember feeling so scared, feeling inadequate to look after such a precious gift. You were only a few hours old and you gripped onto my little finger so tight I could barley believe it. It was in that moment that I fell completely and utterly in love with you and knew that I would do whatever I could to be the greatest mum I could be for you.

You see Luca you was giving me the hope and strength I needed before you could even talk.

Loving and growing up with you has been the biggest and greatest adventure of my life. These past 5 years have been the best, making memories with you and watching you grow into the most handsome, kind, smart, funny, wild, sensitive and caring little boy. The years have gone by oh so fast, I remember knowing I needed to get my sleep but I would watch over you for hours in the middle of the night, your first laugh, your first crawl, your first steps and your first words. They have left imprints on my mind that will stay with me forever. You have brought us all so much happiness, I am so thankful to have had all this precious time we have had having you as our only child. Thank you for the most special five years I could have ever wished for.

As you know a new chapter is heading towards us soon, we have another little love on the ride of life with us. I wanted a sibling for you so very much, someone to travel through childhood and life with you. I truly believe there is no greater gift than for a child to have a sibling. No matter how our world changes, you will always be my first. We will love another together and we will all grow together.

Thank you for loving me even when I hardly knew anything about being a mum and made mistakes. Thank you for being there when I had no one else. Thank you for giving me this life and thank you above all for being YOU ❤️

You are the best big brother I could ever ask for, for your little sister. There is nobody I would rather her learn from than you. You see you made me into Mamma, you made me into the mum I am for you today and for the Mamma I will also be for your sister. How special is that!

You will always be my little bambino no matter how big you get.

I love you Luca, beyond words. Forever.

Love Mamma ❤️

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